BACKSTREET BOYS’ AJ MCLEAN JOINS LULU ON HER TURNING POINTS PODCAST
On this week’s episode of The Lulu Podcast: Turning Points, Lulu speaks to AJ McLean from the Backstreet Boys as the group gear up to release Millennium 2.0 (out 11th July) and begin their highly anticipated 21-date residency, Into The Millennium, at Las Vegas’ Sphere. AJ and Lulu speak about parenting, AJ’s struggle with addiction, and the secret to Backstreet Boys’ global success. You can listen to the episode on Spotify here and on Apple Podcasts here.
On why Backstreet Boys have been so successful:
“We have the best fans in the world – all over the world – that have kept us going strong, that have been with us since day one. And then honestly, the most I would see probably most important is the five of us. The communication, the respect, and the openness and honesty is what you don’t always see within groups. You know, there’s one or two members that might wanna go solo or have their own kind of agenda. And if any of us have ever gotten a big head for whatever reason – look, everyone’s got an ego, some are big, some are small – we always know how to keep each other in check. If someone starts to get… a little too big for their britches, we’re like, ‘hey, you gotta pump it back’. We’ve got great families and we’ve great women in our lives that have kept us grounded.”
On being open with his kids about his addiction:
“Now it’s come to the place where, fortunately, for both my girls, it’s not unheard in the world that I am in, that I’m an alcoholic, and I’m an addict. I’ve been sober now for almost four years and I’ve been in and out of the rooms for over 25 years. Luckily for my kids, they’ve never – not once – seen me drunk or high. They never will, they never have to. But it is talked about in my house. I have explained it to my girls because they’re both very, very in tune with what’s going on in the world, they’re very smart girls.”
On going sober for his children:
“The biggest turning point for me was three and a half years ago. I was doing a show in Miami on my own with a friend of mine and I went out that night. I went hard. Luckily for me I dodged a huge bullet because the fentanyl crisis hadn’t escalated to where it is now, but it was happening, it was out there, but it wasn’t as much common knowledge as it is today. And at that point in my life, I had taken all the dealers out of my phone, so I didn’t know anybody in Miami – I’m hanging out with some random people. One thing led to another. I got drunk, ended up doing drugs. It could have killed me. It didn’t for whatever reason, but it could have. But when I flew home the next day, as most addicts do, we try to mask it. I drank a crap tonne of coffee and tried breath mints and all this stuff. But my wife already knew and was just waiting for me to be honest, which was my biggest problem for years – being honest with anyone about it because I was trying to make it work. And of course, as we know, it worked until it didn’t.
But when I got home, my oldest was at dance class, my youngest was home. I walked up to give her a hug and she wouldn’t give me a hug. And I was like, ‘what’s going on babe?’ And she’s like, ‘I don’t know, you don’t smell like my daddy’. And that was it. Like the biggest light bulb in the world went off and I was like, ‘what are you doing? Why are you still doing this?’ The next day I went back to a meeting, and I have been sober ever since, but this time is different. This time I’m doing what has been suggested. I’m going my 12 steps. I’m showing up.”
On struggling with low self-esteem:
“My two biggest issues that were kind of the precipice for my disease, personally, was love and relationship addiction, as well as extreme low self-esteem. A lot of people would look at me and be like, ‘how in the hell do you have low self-esteem doing what you do?’ I’m like, ‘it’s a lot easier than you think’. I did not like the person I was. I wasn’t comfortable. The only place I felt safe was on stage. I felt untouchable. I felt comfortable. But the minute I walked off stage, I didn’t know how to turn the off switch on. I felt that I needed to be this character 24/7 to have acceptance, to be loved, to have the attention from women, from people, from other artists, whatever it was – even my own family. Going to the Meadows, I learned boundaries, which I never had in my life. I am a very codependent person, but I’ve learned to dial it back. I’ve learned that no is a complete sentence. You know, boundaries to me is the biggest thing. The number one thing that I learned is authenticity and knowing that AJ is a character in a band, which is great, and that what I do is a job, it doesn’t define me.”
On Backstreet Boys’ upcoming residency at The Sphere in Las Vegas:
“The difference with us is we’re still going to do a show like Backstreet Boys do. We’re still dancing. We’re going to be running around on stage. It’s going to a typical Backstreet Boys show elevated extremely, but the content is going to be unlike anything anyone’s ever seen. We have a couple of tricks up our sleeve too that no one has done inside this venue. Some of them are a little terrifying, but we’re gonna make it work. I strongly believe people are gonna have to see the show more than once to really see every little detail because there’s a lot of Easter eggs… And just so people know, we are doing the entire Millennium album with, you know, some medleys here and there, plus we have some of our favourites and a couple of other tricks up our sleeve, which I can’t give away.”
On advising new bands to get a good lawyer:
“I’ve been asked in multiple interviews, ‘hey, do you have any advice for a new group forming?’ And it’s like, look, I’m not going to tell you what to do or what not to do. I’ll say get a good lawyer. That’s a good thing to start, Because we went through the wringer, for many years, but we came out the other end. But what I will do is the same thing I do when it comes to recovery. I’ll share my story of what I’ve been through, what I learned not to do, and what I learned to do. And if that helps a new group or a new artist that’s coming up, that’s great.”
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